Women jokes - Page 52

Estreeter · January 25th, 2018, 11:00 AM

Have you heard about that new aftershave that drives women absolutely crazy

You haven't

Well

It smells the same as $100 notes

MaxJoker · January 26th, 2018, 09:58 AM

My wife finally beautified the house yesterday ,

She moved out.

**Hertz** · January 27th, 2018, 03:45 PM

MaxJoker · January 29th, 2018, 01:13 PM

I don't tell sexist jokes when in mixed company any more ,

They're too complicated for women to understand.

**Mister Fide** · January 29th, 2018, 01:41 PM

"Who was that overweight man i saw you with yesterday?"
"That was no overweight man........that was my wife!"

Estreeter · January 31st, 2018, 11:42 AM

**DoctorWho** · January 31st, 2018, 04:14 PM

-

What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend?

Wipes his butt..

-

**DoctorWho** · January 31st, 2018, 04:15 PM

-

Why did Sally fall off of the Swing?

Because she has no arms..

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Well, it's NOT SALLY!!

-

**DoctorWho** · January 31st, 2018, 04:20 PM

-

We went to see a movie the other night. I sat in an aisle seat as I
usually do because it feels a little roomier.

Just as the feature was about to start, a blonde from the center of
the row got up and started working her way out.
“Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me, gotta hurry,
oops, excuse me.”

By the time she got to me, I was trying to look around her..
I was a little impatient, so I said, “Couldn’t you have done this a
little earlier?”

“No!” she said in a loud whisper.
“The ‘TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE PLEASE’ message just
came up on the screen and mine is in the car.”

-

**DoctorWho** · January 31st, 2018, 04:25 PM

-

I was at the pub last night..

Saw this really hot Chinese girl..
Asked her for her number

She leaned over and "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!"

I said, "Wow! That's incredible, but I still want your number.."

Her friend leaned over and said
"She gave it to you.. she is saying '666-3629'."

-

January 25th, 2018, 11:00 AM	#511
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,120 Thanks: 449,724 Thanked 896,857 Times in 60,322 Posts	Have you heard about that new aftershave that drives women absolutely crazy You haven't Well It smells the same as $100 notes __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

January 26th, 2018, 09:58 AM	#512
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,564 Times in 69,067 Posts	My wife finally beautified the house yesterday , She moved out. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

January 29th, 2018, 01:13 PM	#514
MaxJoker Beloved Brother Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Cemetery Gardens_Arterial Blood Lane_Rampton Secure Unit_Extra Violent F Wing_Cell 19 Posts: 69,106 Thanks: 372,713 Thanked 987,564 Times in 69,067 Posts	I don't tell sexist jokes when in mixed company any more , They're too complicated for women to understand. __________________ My hypocrisy only goes so To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

January 31st, 2018, 11:42 AM	#516
Estreeter *Administrator* Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: The 19th hole Posts: 58,120 Thanks: 449,724 Thanked 896,857 Times in 60,322 Posts	__________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

January 31st, 2018, 04:14 PM	#517
DoctorWho Time Lord Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Tomorrow............................. It's a bit complicated Posts: 3,659 Thanks: 91,219 Thanked 94,848 Times in 3,538 Posts	- What does a cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? Wipes his butt.. - __________________ - - - To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. - - - Please Read, Know and Follow the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

January 27th, 2018, 03:45 PM	#513
Hertz Lunatic Weirdo Join Date: Feb 2015 Location: At The Border Of Madness Posts: 10,652 Thanks: 165,158 Thanked 201,658 Times in 10,667 Posts

January 29th, 2018, 01:41 PM	#515
Mister Fide Veteran Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: Nearly there Posts: 892 Thanks: 23,075 Thanked 17,987 Times in 890 Posts	"Who was that overweight man i saw you with yesterday?" "That was no overweight man........that was my wife!"

January 31st, 2018, 04:15 PM	#518
DoctorWho Time Lord Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Tomorrow............................. It's a bit complicated Posts: 3,659 Thanks: 91,219 Thanked 94,848 Times in 3,538 Posts	- Why did Sally fall off of the Swing? Because she has no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Well, it's NOT SALLY!! - __________________ - - - To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. - - - Please Read, Know and Follow the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

January 31st, 2018, 04:20 PM	#519
DoctorWho Time Lord Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Tomorrow............................. It's a bit complicated Posts: 3,659 Thanks: 91,219 Thanked 94,848 Times in 3,538 Posts	- We went to see a movie the other night. I sat in an aisle seat as I usually do because it feels a little roomier. Just as the feature was about to start, a blonde from the center of the row got up and started working her way out. “Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me, gotta hurry, oops, excuse me.” By the time she got to me, I was trying to look around her.. I was a little impatient, so I said, “Couldn’t you have done this a little earlier?” “No!” she said in a loud whisper. “The ‘TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE PLEASE’ message just came up on the screen and mine is in the car.” - __________________ - - - To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. - - - Please Read, Know and Follow the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

January 31st, 2018, 04:25 PM	#520
DoctorWho Time Lord Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: Tomorrow............................. It's a bit complicated Posts: 3,659 Thanks: 91,219 Thanked 94,848 Times in 3,538 Posts	- I was at the pub last night.. Saw this really hot Chinese girl.. Asked her for her number She leaned over and "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow! That's incredible, but I still want your number.." Her friend leaned over and said "She gave it to you.. she is saying '666-3629'." - __________________ - - - To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. - - - Please Read, Know and Follow the To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

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