Collected old threads from Funnies

[otiscleotus]

From a humor magazine of the 70s & 80s.

[otiscleotus]

From the same source.

[JohnsonJackson]

nice! i remember the work of both those guys, mark marek and ron barrett, from "national lampoon" in the 80's... a fairly highbrow college humor mag. their work was quite quirky, but once you got the hang of their humor... very enjoyable. much like the magazine itself. barrett also did a tonne of puzzle cartoons for the excellent "games" magazine (still running!).

another example of one of the top cartoons from that mag; trots and bonnie:
http://comicscomicsmag.com/wp-conten...sandbonnie.gif

the magazines are currently not very hard to find on the net as scanned downloads, so lots of great funnies lie in wait for anyone interested. some content will not have aged all that well-- other stuff will be a delicious look back into a certain 80's kind of niche.

[Lemo]

From the song about good beer and harmful water, from old Soviet comedy.

Oceans, rivers and seas
They causing much harm for all of us
Nobody drowns in beer
It's water, that's kiling us.

[Warren G]

http://youtu.be/VzcBDXyJO_w

[squigg58]

A couple of airline stories ...

A woman on a flight ordered a meal, then decided she didn't want it as she was suddenly "allergic" to all sorts of things. After complaining about the airline, the staff, and the choice of food, she demanded a sandwich instead. The stewardess offered her a choice of beef, cheese or tuna. After much deliberation, and a lot of grumbling, the woman said she didn't eat red meat and didn't like cheese, so she'd have the tuna. The stewardess fetched a tuna sandwich, gave it to the woman and headed back to her station. The woman then stood up, waved the sandwich in the air and announced in a loud, snooty voice that it said "bacon" on the wrapper. The stewardess turned, smiled sweetly and said "Madam. I think you'll find it actually says ba.com"!

The stewardess on a small, twin-prop commuter aircraft went up to the flight-deck and told the captain that several of the passengers were rather nervous, having never been on such a small plane before. The captain decided to make an announcement. "Ladies and gentlemen, this is Captain Jones speaking. I understand that most of you have only ever flown in much larger aircraft. Well, this one may be small, but the view out is so much better! We're now flying above some particularly spectacular scenery, and if you all move to the left side of the aircraft to get a good look ... we'll tip over!!!"

[haroldeye]

Two heard from the RAF

In the event of an emergency

- Please leave through one of the emergency exits or any other hole which conveniently appears in the fuselage.

- Obey the 'follow me' signs written on the soles of my shoes.

[NIN]

A Fabulous Flight Rap

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/5015315/Air-steward-who-raps-safety-announcement-becomes-YouTube-hit.html

[lothian]

A flight attendant after a particularly bad landing

Captain Crash has sucessfully brought the plane to a screeching halt ,will all survivors
please pick their way through the wreckage and make their way to the terminal.

[iufrenchman]

Here's a few great reasons to allow drinking in the workplace...

1. It's an incentive to show up.

2. It reduces stress

3. It leads to more honest communications.

4. It reduces complaints about low pay.

5. It cuts down on time off because you can work with a hangover.

6. Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.

7. It helps save on heating costs in the winter.

8. It encourages carpooling.

9. Increases job satisfaction because if you have a bad job you don't care.

10. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.

11. It makes fellow employees look better.

12. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.

13. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they have had a couple of drinks.

14. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.