April 28th, 2018, 01:51 PM | #3581 | |
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I wish I lived under the sea like a Bond Villain......but just livin' I don't wanna take over the world....The Man can keep it.
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Lord, we might end up dead or worse, poor |
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May 30th, 2018, 08:48 PM | #3582 |
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Wish granted. You are now an Octopussy - with 8 tentacles, a big hairy bush, and a tendency to cry when you watch chick flicks.
I wish for a big stainless steel container full of real home-made ice cream.
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May 30th, 2018, 11:35 PM | #3583 |
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Granted. Your fridge however is not big enough to contain it. Sitting at room temperature in your kitchen, it quickly melts, rusting the lid tightly shut. And as it's real home-made ice-cream, it contains no preservatives. Your house is soon filled with the stink of rancid buttermilk.
I wish I had a portal to a paradisiacal parallel universe |
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June 2nd, 2018, 06:48 PM | #3584 | |
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I wish to not have to put up with no more crap ever.
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Lord, we might end up dead or worse, poor Last edited by @llatse@; June 2nd, 2018 at 06:49 PM.. Reason: spelling |
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June 2nd, 2018, 07:18 PM | #3585 | |
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Wish granted. Slowly the crap builds up in your bowels. Your belly expands and one day....BOOOOM!!! I wish I could dance like Ryan Reynolds |
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June 5th, 2018, 12:27 PM | #3586 |
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Wish granted, but your good looks and dancing skills attract the attention of a gay sexual psychopath, who really wants to be you.
One day he clamps an ether soaked rag over your mouth and chucks you in a van, and you wake up in a basement well hearing a voice say, "it rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again." I wish to go back in time 300 years and walk the place where I live as it was in its pristine undeveloped state.
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June 5th, 2018, 10:33 PM | #3587 | |
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You donate your find to the local history museum who advise you it is about three hundred years old and is probably from one of the first settlers in the area. No doubt killed and eaten by the cannibalistic tribe that once called the region home. I wish to finally dig out that troublesome rock in my garden only to discover it's the world's biggest gold nugget. |
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June 7th, 2018, 06:44 PM | #3588 | |
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Id like beat the crap outta Conor McGregor
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June 8th, 2018, 08:01 AM | #3589 |
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Wish granted. But instead of being seen like a hero - you beat him so badly everybody ends up feeling sorry for Conor.
I wish it would be raining women |
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June 8th, 2018, 12:26 PM | #3590 |
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Granted, it rains women for 40 days and 40 nights, all of whom are raging Misandrists, Feminists and those who aren't are Lesbian. Not one even looks at you.
I wish the use of a private jet at any time, so I could avoid the queues at airports.
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