The Bored thread

[medvedev]

I get more and more bored while waiting all the upgrades, bitdefenders, virus scanning etc. finish their jobs, especially when one can do nothing but staring at the message "don't turn the computer off".

Happy yawnings!

[GailFan]

Originally Posted by TommyMilfiger

Order booze and some great food, dial up some hookers, invite yer friends and call up Slayer to play at your place.

Fcuk boredom, Billy

To make it even more interesting, eat Slayer, have sex with the food and get the prostitutes to perform some music.

[medvedev]

Too hot to read
Too hot to watch a movie
Too hot to take a walk
Too hot to bike
Too hot to take the dog for a pee
Too hot to sleep
Too hot to eat
Too hot for computer : it heats and increases even more the temperature
Too crowded in the swimming pool
Too crowded in fresh places
Too crowded anywhere where it is fresh

[Estreeter]

Originally Posted by medvedev

Too hot to read
Too hot to watch a movie
Too hot to take a walk
Too hot to bike
Too hot to take the dog for a pee
Too hot to sleep
Too hot to eat
Too hot for computer : it heats and increases even more the temperature
Too crowded in the swimming pool
Too crowded in fresh places
Too crowded anywhere where it is fresh

You should jump on your bike and take the dog along too a secluded beach where there is a sea breeze, don't forget your ipad too so you can read/watch a novel that's become a movie. On the way stop off and grab something small too eat and drink. Once there just prop yourself up under a shady tree and let the dog relieve himself in the water

[medvedev]

Biking along while the dog would run when it's so hot ? That would immediatly be reported to one or another animal wellfare society !

No breeze on the beaches that are too far anyway, so I'd have to put the bike and the dog in the car and spend more than a couple of hours in the traffic jam before reaching a crowded beach full of siringues with AIDS virusses in the sand (at least that's what they say in one of the hoaxes we get so often in mails).

No room under any shady tree, too crowded, everybody has already put towels to keep their place, and if I ever dared to let the dog releive himself in the water (supposing I could reach some), there would immediately be a cop to say that dogs are not allowed there.

As for the ipad, do you really think that with such a sun outtside it is possible to see something on its screen ?

About drinking, that too becomes threatening, since another hoax warned me that rats and all other kind of eerie animals pissed on the tin cans while they were stored, so one can get leptospirosis (the hoax speaks of the virus of leptospirosis, while it is not a virus, but what else can you expoect from a a hoax ?), and all other kind of bizarre and funny illnesses that even the best researchers of the US army have not found out yet.


Any other suggestion ?


Meanwhile, I'll stay home.
The dog too.
Dull, dull, dull.

Thanks for suggesting anyway.

[Estreeter]

Originally Posted by medvedev

Any other suggestion ?

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How hot is hot

[medvedev]

Great, but I have a better idea, maybe the mods could accept for once to open a subscription so I can pay me this (in a tax free country of course, so please, give until it hurts, it will give you a good karma) :



I'll thank everybody who can help (and subscribe in cash of course) by sending a personnal email.

Meanwhile, I'll watch an old episode of star trek, Deep space nine must have a cooling system.

Yawn, yawn, yawn.

[medvedev]

At least temperature dropped a bit today, so it's a good time to do something interesting, like having a good meal, really !


But :
- the grocery is closed for holidays

- the baker is closed because his daughter marries

- the cheese shop is closed because at this time of the year he does not sell enough

- the butcher is closed because his brother who brings him his goods is on a trip with his new girlfriend

- the fish shop is closed because it wanted to close

- the ice-cream shop is closed because they must rebuild because of new regulations

- the tea-shop is closed because the lady who owns it is on a trip with the guy who brings goods to the butcher

- the restaurants are closed because they sold enough during the national holiday

- the tobacco shop is open, but I don't eat tobacco


Finally it might be better so because :
- vegetables and fruit are full of salmonellas, and contain dead insects, since it is impossible to harvest them without

- pastry can be contaminated (salmonellas too)

- cheese gives you listeriosis when crude, and is as tasty as an old chewing gum when made with pasteurised milk

- meat can be full of salmonellas (them again !), and, even worse, delicatessen can have salmonellas (again again, isn't that boring) and even worse, they can give botulism

- fish can be full of salmonellas (yeah they are everywhere waiting to make one as sick as possible), contain mercury and are full of worms sometimes (yeark!) Raw stuff (oysters) can be full of hepatitis viruses just waiting to invade your liver.

- ice cream can contain, guess what ? Salmonellas

- the restaurants as I have read somewhere in some kind ok local gossip paper are not satisfying new hygienic regulations. Who knows what we can get when we go out to eat there !


If you ever meet a salmonella, don't ask questions, just kill it !




So, I'm safely staying home, where even the water we drink out of plastic bottles is full of organic stuff from the plastic container.


Laying down on my bed, if I don't die from all those dangerous threatening things outside there, I can always bore to dead, at least that might be safe !

Meanwhile, I'll watch an old episode of Bonanza, hoping there is no hidden message in it that could make me sick.

Peeve peeve peeve.

[blueballsdc]

Originally Posted by billybunter

Good idea! Max can bring ABBA so it will be an early night.

I got drunk with an ABBA cover band once. It wasn't boring.

[billybunter]

I remember taking a girl on a date to a Meat Loaf cover band. I was very bored. They opened with "bat out of hell" and finished with it.
I got completely plastered on guinness and bushmills whiskey. Never even got a shag.