Quotations, Fav Movie Lines, and so on and so forth etc

[tonil]

Peter Gibbons: The thing is, Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.
Bob Porter: Don't... don't care?
Peter Gibbons: It's a problem of motivation, all right? Now if I work my ass off and Initech ships a few extra units, I don't see another dime, so where's the motivation? And here's something else, Bob: I have eight different bosses right now.
Bob Slydell: I beg your pardon?
Peter Gibbons: Eight bosses.
Bob Slydell: Eight?
Peter Gibbons: Eight, Bob. So that means that when I make a mistake, I have eight different people coming by to tell me about it. That's my only real motivation is not to be hassled, that and the fear of losing my job. But you know, Bob, that will only make someone work just hard enough not to get fired.

[garthok newo]

From "My Favorite year"
Selma Diamond "This is for ladies only"
Peter O'Toole "And so is this ma'm, but occasionally I have to pass water thru it" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7z-M92N4L8

[DonnyJoe]

"Gentleman,you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.

[Mal Hombre]

General Robert E. Lee: General, you must look to your division.
Major General George E. Pickett: General Lee... I have no division.
After Pickett's division was virtually annihilated in Lee's attack on the third day at Gettysburg 1863

[turat]

Remember the "My Other Car Is... " bumper stickers where people driving nondescript or just plain old shitty cars boosted their egos by declaring that they had a 2nd "awesome" vehicle that they just didn't happen to be driving at the moment, be it a Porsche, fighter jet or what have you. Yeah right!

Well I happened to be lining up one day behind this gargantuan, clapped out late 70's Pontiac Parisienne, burping exhaust fumes as both of us were inching our way toward the pick-up window at the Burger King on Van Ness in San Francisco. The line was long that day, so my eyes wandered and then I noticed that this Pontiac had this sticker on the edge of its trunk with a most amusing, brutally frank declaration:

THIS IS IT. THERE IS NO OTHER CAR.

[blondifan]

There's only X amount of time. You can do whatever you want with that time. It's your time.
Lou Reed

[Mal Hombre]

Announcer: We would like to apologize for the way in which politicians are represented in this programme. It was never our intention to imply that politicians are weak-kneed, political time-servers who are more concerned with their personal vendettas and private power struggles than the problems of government. Nor to suggest at any point that they sacrifice their credibility by denying free debate on vital matters in the mistaken impression that party unity comes before the well-being of the people they supposedly represent. Nor to imply at any stage that they are squabbling little toadies without an ounce of concern for the vital social problems of today. Nor indeed do we intend that viewers should consider them as crabby, ulcerous, little self-seeking vermin with furry legs and an excessive addiction to alcohol and certain explicit sexual practices which some people might find offensive. We are sorry if this impression has come across.
Monty Python's Flying Circus

[tsunamiSD]

[tygrkhat40]

Originally Posted by Mal Hombre

Announcer: We would like to apologize for the way in which politicians are represented in this programme. It was never our intention to imply that politicians are weak-kneed, political time-servers who are more concerned with their personal vendettas and private power struggles than the problems of government. Nor to suggest at any point that they sacrifice their credibility by denying free debate on vital matters in the mistaken impression that party unity comes before the well-being of the people they supposedly represent. Nor to imply at any stage that they are squabbling little toadies without an ounce of concern for the vital social problems of today. Nor indeed do we intend that viewers should consider them as crabby, ulcerous, little self-seeking vermin with furry legs and an excessive addiction to alcohol and certain explicit sexual practices which some people might find offensive. We are sorry if this impression has come across.
Monty Python's Flying Circus

This was written almost 45 years ago...AND IT'S ONLY GOTTEN WORSE!!!!

[MaxJoker]

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

~ Miles Kington

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

~ Emo Philips

My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished eleven beers three burgers and a chocolate cake. She was right. I feel better already.

~ Dave Berry