Post your corny jokes - Page 1268

**ball7** · September 6th, 2017, 03:08 PM

Adam wasn't the first man.

God made a prototype on the second day, by the name of Fabio.

**maildude** · September 6th, 2017, 11:35 PM

An Irishman walked into a pub with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender took a look and asked, "Hey, that's pretty neat. Where'd you get him?"
"Dublin," the parrot responded.

**ball7** · September 7th, 2017, 02:16 PM

Then there's the one about the tuff female diver, who always found her self with muff in her mouth

The_Swammi · September 9th, 2017, 07:44 AM

While golfing, a senior gentleman accidentally overturned his golf cart late one afternoon.
A very attractive, young, female golfer, who lives in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise and called out, "Are you OK?"
"I’m OK, thanks," he replied, as he pulled himself out of the twisted cart.
She said, "Come up to my villa, rest a while, and I’ll help you get the cart up later."
The old guy noticed her silky bathrobe was partially open, revealing what appeared to be a very nice figure.
"That’s mighty nice of you," he answered, "but I don’t think my wife would like it."
"Oh, come on now!" she insisted. She was so pretty, and very, very persuasive. He was weak.
"Well, OK," he finally agreed.
After a couple of Scotch and sodas, he thanked her and said, "I feel a lot better now. But I know my wife is going to be really upset. So I’d better go now."
"Don’t be silly!" she said with a smile, letting her robe fall slightly more open. "Stay for a while. Your wife won’t know anything. By the way, where is she?"
He replied, "Still under the cart, I suppose."

**maildude** · September 10th, 2017, 05:01 AM

Q: What do a tribe of pygmies and a women's track team have in common?
A: The tribe of pygmies is a cunning bunch of runts.

**ball7** · September 10th, 2017, 12:19 PM

I recenty had to name my first born.
Since I want him to grow up to a dreamer and a achiver.

So I named Cunt Hunter Funkel

**rondori** · September 10th, 2017, 04:11 PM

Q: What does a hooker with the runs and an epileptic corn husker have in common?
A: The epileptic shucks between fits.

and now for something completely different:

**gedly** · September 10th, 2017, 06:57 PM

I don't want to admit to my wife that I've started using Viagra. Not sure how long I can keep this up though.

captain fanta · September 10th, 2017, 09:16 PM

"I decided to have a map of Italy tattooed on my chest. Bad decision really, I ended up with incredibly sore Naples"

**ball7** · September 10th, 2017, 10:09 PM

My wife is a feminist
I learned that the hard way
Finding her in bed with Ellen Page
When I asked if I could join them.
she told me "no way"

September 6th, 2017, 11:35 PM	#12672
maildude Vintage Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: In postal purgatory Posts: 760 Thanks: 1,162 Thanked 14,111 Times in 748 Posts	An Irishman walked into a pub with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender took a look and asked, "Hey, that's pretty neat. Where'd you get him?" "Dublin," the parrot responded. __________________ LET FREEDOM WAIT

September 7th, 2017, 02:16 PM	#12673
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,976 Times in 15,730 Posts	Then there's the one about the tuff female diver, who always found her self with muff in her mouth Last edited by ball7; September 8th, 2017 at 10:28 PM..

September 10th, 2017, 05:01 AM	#12675
maildude Vintage Member Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: In postal purgatory Posts: 760 Thanks: 1,162 Thanked 14,111 Times in 748 Posts	Q: What do a tribe of pygmies and a women's track team have in common? A: The tribe of pygmies is a cunning bunch of runts. __________________ LET FREEDOM WAIT

September 10th, 2017, 04:11 PM	#12677
rondori Vintage Member Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: New Mexico Posts: 561 Thanks: 36,148 Thanked 14,025 Times in 536 Posts	Q: What does a hooker with the runs and an epileptic corn husker have in common? A: The epileptic shucks between fits. and now for something completely different: __________________ I'm OK, you're UKE: all cultures are multicultural, all races are multiracial. To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

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September 6th, 2017, 03:08 PM	#12671
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,976 Times in 15,730 Posts	Adam wasn't the first man. God made a prototype on the second day, by the name of Fabio.

September 9th, 2017, 07:44 AM	#12674
The_Swammi Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2009 Posts: 7 Thanks: 4,361 Thanked 76 Times in 4 Posts	While golfing, a senior gentleman accidentally overturned his golf cart late one afternoon. A very attractive, young, female golfer, who lives in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise and called out, "Are you OK?" "I’m OK, thanks," he replied, as he pulled himself out of the twisted cart. She said, "Come up to my villa, rest a while, and I’ll help you get the cart up later." The old guy noticed her silky bathrobe was partially open, revealing what appeared to be a very nice figure. "That’s mighty nice of you," he answered, "but I don’t think my wife would like it." "Oh, come on now!" she insisted. She was so pretty, and very, very persuasive. He was weak. "Well, OK," he finally agreed. After a couple of Scotch and sodas, he thanked her and said, "I feel a lot better now. But I know my wife is going to be really upset. So I’d better go now." "Don’t be silly!" she said with a smile, letting her robe fall slightly more open. "Stay for a while. Your wife won’t know anything. By the way, where is she?" He replied, "Still under the cart, I suppose."

September 10th, 2017, 12:19 PM	#12676
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,976 Times in 15,730 Posts	I recenty had to name my first born. Since I want him to grow up to a dreamer and a achiver. So I named Cunt Hunter Funkel

September 10th, 2017, 06:57 PM	#12678
gedly Veteran Member Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 3,234 Thanks: 19,879 Thanked 69,305 Times in 3,171 Posts	I don't want to admit to my wife that I've started using Viagra. Not sure how long I can keep this up though.

September 10th, 2017, 09:16 PM	#12679
captain fanta Member Join Date: Sep 2010 Posts: 79 Thanks: 39,751 Thanked 1,012 Times in 75 Posts	"I decided to have a map of Italy tattooed on my chest. Bad decision really, I ended up with incredibly sore Naples"

September 10th, 2017, 10:09 PM	#12680
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,690 Thanks: 66,280 Thanked 209,976 Times in 15,730 Posts	My wife is a feminist I learned that the hard way Finding her in bed with Ellen Page When I asked if I could join them. she told me "no way"