Post your corny jokes - Page 1281

**ball7** · November 16th, 2017, 10:18 AM

*gets hit by a car*
Passerby: "ARE YOU OKAY?"
Me: "Please... I need my... phone"
*opens Twitter*
Me typing: "LMFAOOOOO YALL GUESS WHAT"

**ball7** · November 16th, 2017, 10:20 AM

Black Friday is coming up, so remember Retail language:

"Need help finding a size?" = Please stop fucking up my display
"I can put that back for you" = you're going to fuck up my display
"Let me hold your items for you" = So you dont leave this somewhere and fuck up a display

**effCup** · November 16th, 2017, 10:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ball7

Black Friday is coming up

Not till April... and July... but I suppose the next Black Friday is always "coming up"?

**trailmaster** · November 16th, 2017, 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by effCup

Not till April... and July... but I suppose the next Black Friday is always "coming up"?

In the U.S. "Black Friday" starts the day after the Thansgiving holiday. It is the beginning of the crazy Christmas shopping period where everystore in the entire nation has practically everything on sale. It is estimated that more than 30% of an entire years sales are made during this period from November 24 up to December 25th.

**effCup** · November 16th, 2017, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by trailmaster

In the U.S. "Black Friday" starts the day after the Thansgiving holiday.

Thank goodness we don't have any thanksgiving here, then.

(Just a stupid button.

)
My mistake, I thought it was a reference to Fri 13th.

ontstroke · November 16th, 2017, 01:25 PM

What did zero say to eight?

Nice belt.

**mrfixit** · November 16th, 2017, 05:52 PM

**Mister Fide** · November 16th, 2017, 06:09 PM

Q: What qualifications do you require to be Santa Claus?
A: Several Ho Ho Ho levels.

**ball7** · November 16th, 2017, 10:15 PM

What's the difference between Clinton and a hamburger? Some women in Arkansas never had a hamburger.

**effCup** · November 17th, 2017, 12:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ball7

Some women in Arkansas never had a hamburger.

Hillary always was quick off the mark, lickety-split.

November 16th, 2017, 05:52 PM	#12807
mrfixit Vintage Member Join Date: May 2009 Location: Elm Street Posts: 9,401 Thanks: 165,867 Thanked 114,835 Times in 9,416 Posts	__________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 0 or greater. You currently have 0 posts. Where's my Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator?

November 16th, 2017, 10:18 AM	#12801
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,697 Thanks: 66,303 Thanked 210,021 Times in 15,737 Posts	gets hit by a car Passerby: "ARE YOU OKAY?" Me: "Please... I need my... phone" opens Twitter Me typing: "LMFAOOOOO YALL GUESS WHAT"

November 16th, 2017, 10:20 AM	#12802
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,697 Thanks: 66,303 Thanked 210,021 Times in 15,737 Posts	Black Friday is coming up, so remember Retail language: "Need help finding a size?" = Please stop fucking up my display "I can put that back for you" = you're going to fuck up my display "Let me hold your items for you" = So you dont leave this somewhere and fuck up a display

November 16th, 2017, 01:25 PM	#12806
ontstroke Member Join Date: Jan 2017 Posts: 12 Thanks: 38 Thanked 88 Times in 9 Posts	What did zero say to eight? Nice belt.

November 16th, 2017, 06:09 PM	#12808
Mister Fide Veteran Member Join Date: Nov 2011 Location: Nearly there Posts: 892 Thanks: 23,075 Thanked 17,987 Times in 890 Posts	Q: What qualifications do you require to be Santa Claus? A: Several Ho Ho Ho levels.

November 16th, 2017, 10:15 PM	#12809
ball7 Veteran Member Join Date: Jul 2013 Location: MIA Posts: 15,697 Thanks: 66,303 Thanked 210,021 Times in 15,737 Posts	What's the difference between Clinton and a hamburger? Some women in Arkansas never had a hamburger.