The corrupt a wish game

[trailmaster]

Wish granted. It's 100 million b.c. There is no money, no stores, nothing to buy. You just have to live off the land and whoops two Velociraptors just grabbed you. One tore your head off and the other disembowled you. A very bloody mess.


I wish I could live my life over again, and not make all the mistakes I made in my present life.

[Sir Honkers]

Originally Posted by trailmaster

I wish I could live my life over again, and not make all the mistakes I made in my present life.

Granted. This time around you vow not to waste one single precious moment of your time on the internet. This means you never become a VEF member and therefore never made this wish resulting in you disappearing up the rectum of your own paradox.
I wish I'd played the gardener in the billiard room scene with Marilyn Chambers from the movie Insatiable.

[bowlinggreen]

Wish granted, but in that alternate universe, things play out differently. It turns out that you are not quite "up" for the moment. Given your wilting performance, Marilyn and the director lose patience with you, and the scene quickly turns into something else, with Marilyn strapping on a huge dildo and doing a vicious femdom number on your ass.

Rather than becoming a classic, that scene is relegated to a now forgotten tape of dismal bondage porn. Though it is never forgotten by you, as after that day, you never shit right again.

I wish for a fusion powered spaceship, so I can go out to Jupiter and become the first person to discover life on Europa.

[Sir Honkers]

Originally Posted by bowlinggreen

I wish for a fusion powered spaceship, so I can go out to Jupiter and become the first person to discover life on Europa.

Granted. The lifeform is a virulent form of space grass that quickly overcomes you, covering you from head to toe. Unlike Jordy Verrill, you don't have a shotgun close to hand, but you do get the lonesome death in a verdant setting.
I wish I had a lifetimes supply of an aphrodisiac that actually worked on women.

[teaktop]

I wish I had a lifetimes supply of an aphrodisiac that actually worked on women.
Granted..
There are a number of scenarios e.g.
Your gay its bugger all use to you then
Your a eunuck ...as above
Or Granted...
Day 1 doorbell rings you run to the door,and there at your doorstep are 5 of the
most beautiful Movie Actresses in the World hungry for your cock
Day 2 ding dong you jog to your door and there are 5 of the most beautiful
Models in the world gagging for you
Day 3 Slightly tired walk to the door ,5 sexiest pornstars suck you sooo good and hard it felt like your brain was sucked outta yer knob
Day 4 crawling now ...5 of the girls you always wanted but never had
Day 5 you cant get up you roll outta bed snail like on your belly slowly get to door.....20 boyfriends are here for revenge......

I wish I owned VEF and I would give everybody a pay rise....[ahhh arent I sweet?]

[bowlinggreen]

Wish granted, but in order to get the money for those pay raises, you have to put risky ads all over VEF. After about 500 VEF members have their computers infected with malware, and many lose their porn collections, a mob of VEF members storms your house and beats the living bejeezus out of you.

A class action lawsuit is filed. VEF is taken away from you, and your wages are garnished forever to pay the huge settlement. Mal Hombre and Max Joker become the principle shareholders in the new VEF, and you are banned for life.

I wish Ariana Grande would do porn.

[ball7]

Wish granted.

But it's scat porn.

I wish they would start work on the next James Bond movie

[bowlinggreen]

Wish granted, they start tomorrow.

Unfortunately you are killed in a car crash 7 days before the premiere.

I wish for a gold-plated Rolls Royce and Malena Morgan sitting naked on my lap as I drive it down the highway.

[teaktop]

"A class action lawsuit is filed. VEF is taken away from you, and your wages are garnished forever to pay the huge settlement. Mal Hombre and Max Joker become the principle shareholders in the new VEF, and you are banned for life."
Wow thats harsh jeese Max taking control ....

I wish for a gold-plated Rolls Royce and Malena Morgan sitting naked on my lap as I drive it down the highway
Bowlinggreen have you ever read the world according to Garp
Garp freewheeled down the steep hill as he always did into his driveway not noticing the Gold Plated roller parked there Malena was giving Bowlinggreen oral sex when the impact happened, she broke two teeth, strained her neck, and needed stitches in her tongue.
the force of collision was so powerful that she bit off three quarters of Bowlinggreens penis...
I wish for to go back in time and party with David Bowie and the Rolling Stones

[bloke57]

Originally Posted by teaktop

I wish for to go back in time and party with David Bowie and the Rolling Stones

Wish granted. You are all getting along great and you are increasingly asked to join in, setting up equipment and even being asked to play second tambourine on a few album tracks.

Then Jagger and Bowie say "Hey Teaks, we are doing a remake of Dancing in the Street for charity. You can hold a note - why don't you join in? You can be in the video with us".

Gulp!

Now the whole world witnesses the bromance debacle and assumes that you are as gay as a row of tents. All lady action dries up for you over night but you are continually propositioned by chaps with lustrous moustaches.

I wish that, however much I spent, my wallet always had £1,000 in it.