What do you call a redneck with a pig under one arm and a sheep under the other?
Bisexual.
Two rednecks were sitting on their porch one afternoon and looked down at their dog who was licking his dick.
One of the guys looked at the other and said, ''I wish that I could do that.''
The other one then said, 'Don't be stupid, man - that dog would bite you!''
How many rednecks, does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Three. One to hold the bulb, and two to turn the ladder.
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