Q: How do you get a nun pregnant?
A: Dress her up like an altar boy.
Q: Whats the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
A: You can unscrew a light bulb.
Q: Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver?
A: She was a woman
Q: What's a homeless woman use for a vibrator?
A: Two flies in a bottle.
Q: What do you do when your womans watch breaks?
A: Nothing there's a clock on the stove.
Q: How do you really piss off your girlfriend while having sex ?
A: Call her on the phone.
Q: What's black and blue and hates sex?
A: A rape victim.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?
A: They both drip when they're fucked.
Q: What's the first thing a redneck says after losing her virginity ?
A: Get off of me Dad, you're crushing ma cigarettes.
Q: Why is it so hard for Irish women to get pregnant ?
A: Because as soon as the sperm enters the cell it tries to hang itself.
Q: Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself ?
A: You would too if you were named Maaauuurraaagggghhh!
Q: Why do German girls only do it doggy style?
A: They can't stand to see somebody else have a good time.
Q: Whats the difference between a Blonde and a mosquito ?
A: One stops sucking when you slap it.
Q: What is a redneck virgin?
A: A seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.
Q: What do you do when your dishwasher doesn't work?
A: Hit her.
