I was foolish enough to invest in a cassette tape from the Private Shop in Newcastle-upon-Tyne in the late 70s which seemed to be a similarly "so what" experience.
What is it about audio (or aural) sex that it always turns out to be such a ripoff ?
"You're through to 0898 FEEL MY MELONS, ohhh yess, thats it, you like melons don't you. Why don't you squeeze them and feel how ripe they are......"
Sadly, even his live premium rate phone line wasn't enough to save Mr Patel the greengrocer's business and he shut up shop not long afterwards - another victim of Tesco's out of town superstore.
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