[Eric Cartman]

-Does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

- You've got great legs. What time are they open?

- That shirt looks very becoming on you, but if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

- Did you wash your jeans in Windex because I can see myself in your pants.

- Are you from the Caribbean cause Jamaican me horny.


Of course these don't always work because the girl is ready for you. As an example:

- Guy: How do you like your eggs in the morning?

- Girl: Unfertilized.


Sometimes the guy gets the last word though!

-Guy: Would you like to dance?

-Girl: I don't care for this song and surely wouldn't dance with you

-Guy: I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me, I said you look fat in those pants